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Two Snail or Not Two Snail?
by Jay Veegee


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November 30, 2004

Wither Comics? | 03:47 PM

"A former fan" brings up an excellent (if poorly-spelled) point in the comments:

Whatever man you used to have a good stip here but now its balnk all the time. you let me down man, i thought i could count on you. but forget it dude

why dont you explain to yopur viewers why the strip isnt up or why your a quitter man

Why am I a quitter man? I owe it to you, my few remaining viewers, to explain.

Some possible explanations:
World no longer funny in wake of MTA fare hike
Blogging essentially dead
Beaten to submission by Cyborg Overlord Cheney
Spending all my time appearing as a puppet in burlesque numbers starring Nasty Canasta, attempting to hard-sell copies of The Big 40!, or organizing the world-premiere production of Wuthering High this February
Itchy rash, uncomfortable dryness

When might I resume the strip?
Lockhart blogs about something other than the Red Sox
Josh blogs, period
"Coming soon."
National syndication? I'd consider it.
When I receive every item on my Amazon Wish List

wvg comments: "You are a quitter man, and we are all disappointed in you, terribly disappointed. And further more, where the hell is your Amazon Wish List ? And where the hell is Andrew Snail. I am done."

jba comments: "Please teach me how to "blog," and I will do it!"

a former fan comments: "fine man whatever dude you sitll dint give me no answer on why you fukkin strip is always blank you were somebody whos wsite i looked at all the time and its like i dont check it anymore why dont you give your fans some explinations. did you run out of ideas? if so, i can help: how bout a strip about you screwin your fans. itll be true to life dude at least."

November 22, 2004

Jury Duty! | 07:12 AM

Seems to me that making people who go to bed at 3am get up at 7am for 8:45am Jury Duty should be immediately banned by constitutional amendment.

a former fan comments: "Whatever man you used to have a good stip here but now its balnk all the time. you let me down man, i thought i could count on you. but forget it dude why dont you explain to yopur viewers why the strip isnt up or why your a quitter man"

November 15, 2004

Quotes of the Day | 11:26 PM

Thoughts from a potentially crazy man in the E/V station, 5th & 53rd:

"Bush stole the election... stealing makes you a winner!"
"Every man has the basic right to an abortion."

November 11, 2004

Sneaking into a log cabin | 01:29 PM

Leftish gay blogger CertainDisaster infiltrated the RNC way back in August, but didn't get around to finishing his account of it until just before the election. His adventures among gay men who fight for their own oppression are well worth a read. Hey, better to be rich than free, right, boys?

Prologue: Personal protest
PART ONE: RNC: In the beginning

What, if anything, did CertainDisaster learn from his foray into log cabin politics? He says it best:

The main thing that I learned is that Republican gay men want the same thing other gay men want: Sex. These are some of the pick-up lines that were used on me that night (and I kid you not):
1. Want to see my NRA card? (He showed it to me anyway)
2. I'm a tobacco lobbyist. (He showed me his fake cigarette that the company had given him to 'smoke' in public - he couldn't smoke the real ones anymore cause he had lung cancer)
3. I'm all for the constitutional amendment banning gay marriage 'cause my pastor thinks it's a good idea.

November 08, 2004

Oh, that Bard | 11:21 PM

JL emails a quote for the month:

Beware the leader who bangs the drums of war in order to whip the citizenry into a patriotic fervor, for patriotism is indeed a double-edged sword. It both emboldens the blood, just as it narrows the mind...And when the drums of war have reached a fever pitch and the blood boils with hate and the mind has closed, the leader will have no need in seizing the rights of the citizenry. Rather, the citizenry, infused with fear and blinded with patriotism, will offer up all of their rights unto the leader, and gladly so. How do I know? For this is what I have done. And I am Caesar. William Shakespeare

November 06, 2004

Let we forget... | 01:39 PM

From Avenue Q: Everything in life is only For Now.

November 05, 2004

Attacks on America begin! | 02:20 PM

But from an unlikely source: The National Guard.

Debate rages on new PhotoBlog! | 11:28 AM

I should have used the main blog to link long ago to for the amazing photography. But I didn't, and so I am linking for the first time to point out a political debate raging in the comments.

UPDATE: In response to JR's comment "The left knows alot about hate. They are so blinded by it they have lost there way," MLE puts it better than I've ever heard it:

HATE? Hate involves judgment, and those of us on the side of social freedom don't have the room to judge others' choices of how to live their lives.....Hate is the luxury of those who are scared of the unknown, those who are threatened by those who they have not met.....

November 04, 2004

Remember... | 02:13 AM





(Not on this site, granted, but potentially, indeed.)

Alexis comments: "And cats."

aeu comments: "And how!"

wvg comments: "for now, only for now."

JVG comments: "In the immortal words of the musical Avenue Q... "Everything in life is only for now... GEORGE BUSH is only for now!""

November 02, 2004

Vote! | 11:45 AM

Dr. Eisnaugle, you couldn't be more wrong | 11:38 AM

From the Times:

Dr. Eisnaugle said of the president; "He is really connecting with people. We are in a crisis in this country, and I really sense George Bush is the man who can bring us together."
Unless by "us" you mean "Bush supporters," Dr. Eisnaugle, you are sadly mistaken. How can a man who couldn't keep united a country united by 9/11 unite a country divided by his divisive policies? Are Bush supporters really so blind to the hatred their candidate inspires? Or do they just whine "liberal media" and blindly pull the lever?

Coming up after the election: gets un-politicized. Woo!

Dr. Eisnaugle comments: "Listen up you commie pinko, If you had the guts, you'd address me personally instead of criticizing me behind my back. Why don't you go back to Haight-Ashbury where you and all your long-haired artiste comrades can sit around and deconstruct the meaning of the latest editorial in the Village Vice I mean Voice, and let the Eisnaugles of the world go out and fight a real man's battle against terrorism and islamic fundamentalism? So the next time you wanna quote me, quote me on this: "All you hipster, turtle-necked, tattooed, dope-smoking, dog-owning, Craig's List-reading, New York Times-worshipping, latte-drinking, Starbucks-dwelling, bottled water-toting, Williamsburg-dwelling liberal punks...suck." --Dr. Eisnaugle, PhD "

JVG comments: "Dearest Dr. Eisnaugle, I hardly think that a public website which you, if you are in fact you, seem to have found can be construed as "behind your back." And, considering that your contact info was not made public, how could I have addressed you directly? Furthermore, when you comment using the address of a fake website, are you not the one lacking the guts to address the cause in a forthright manner? And perhaps hiding behind a false name? My email and AIM are available on this site why not contact me directly if you wish to engage in a political debate? But never mind. Never mind that the myth of the "real man" is usually a sign of repressed homosexuality. (In the immortal words of Shakespeare, "The lady doth protest too much, methinks.") Never mind that the "battle against terrorism" seems to have been abandoned in favor of an ill-advised invasion of Iraq that is creating more terrorists than it eliminates. Never mind that Christian Fundamentalism is potentially just as dangerous as any other type. Never mind that I'm neither hipster, nor do I wear turtle necks, nor have a tattoo, nor smoke dope, nor have a dog, nor read Craig's list, drink latte OR bottled water, visit Starbucks, or dwell in Williamsburg. Nor, in fact, do I spend my religious holidays kneeling before an effigy of the Grey Lady, chanting "All the News That's Fit to Print" in Latin. Let us, as men of your ilk are wont to do even as they pull the lever to select the next commander-in-chief, ignore the facts, and move on. There are more important things to say. Dr. Eisnaugle, you have a silly name."

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Fine Burlesque Entertainments
Nasty Canasta
Official Burlesque Artist of, cheese queen of Coney Island
Jonny Porkpie
Nasty puppeteer and Burlesque Mayor of New York City.


Tales from the Established Norm
The post-college episodes of the strip from college.
One strip. One thousand endings.

Fred, The Obnoxious Goldfish
An angry slice of piscine fury from the mind of Jay Veegee
One-shot from the files.
Faust: a Primer
Created for the program of Man of Infinite Desire

Produces Interesting Theater. Such as...
Tiny Ninja Theater
No Small Parts. Only Small Actors.
Hudson Valley Playreading Series
"Buddy" Cianci: The Musical
Rhode Island's most popular politician, six times elected, twice convicted

Book of Ages
"Exploring life's landmark ages in hilariously obsessive detail."
buy 30 | buy 40
buy Japanese 40
German 40 (unavailable)

Minor & Incomplete

The ANTAGONISTIC magazine.
Survivor Deadpool
Deadpool Dead.
A great idea!
Unpalatable Ball
Featuring the Discontented Elf.

I Know Them All
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